Day 16 - "Take this mad woman out of here..."

Having given cleo her phone back, on the understanding that she does not call , but only sends or receives text messages, i was inundated with texts last night. Still, it allows her to feel she can be in touch with me and I can reply too, so thats good. I woke this morning to be greeted by a text from some ungodly hour saying "good morning".

I had said I would get to the hospital a little earlier today, so arrived at 1.30pm. I was walking past the nurse's station and Sister called me: "Can I have a word please...?" I thought "oh no, what now!" Sister explained that cleo was bored; because she is younger than most stroke patients, and she has got herself mobile now in the wheelchair, she whizzes up and down the ward all the time, backwards! She has found she can steer better using her good foot, and pushing on the floor, so backwards it is.

"She is bored, and frustrated" explained Sister "take this mad woman out of the ward for a couple of hours, I don't care where, anywhere, just give her a break, and us!" came the heartfelt plea.

Seriously, this is good news, because it shows that cleo is raring to get out. I have explained to her that she must channel that drive to enable her to get the expertise to deal with that lack of balance and movement so she is safe at home. Once that's done i see no reason why she cannot spend at least some time here. We can continue physio on a daily basis if needs be by returning to the hospital.

It is so hard to leave, it hurts, mentally and physically to see her sitting there, so wanting to come home, and I have to say that it will happen soon, but not knowing exactly when. One hour after I left this evening I got a text from her saying "Bored to tears".

Quite funny today when I was alone with cleo, in the toilet actually (she quite likes me taking her there I think, because I am there, and she can take as long as she wants or not, knowing that she won't get left waiting for a nurse to come and get her out. Of course she is kinky too!!) She remarked that she thought I never expected to be doing this that day I first met her. Then she added that maybe she had "broken our contract". I smiled, and kissed her (remember she is sitting on the toilet here) and said that if we needed a contract the love we have would not exist. I promised I would always be there. She is a part of me, and if she weren't there it would not feel right anymore. We don't need contracts or paper to define our love; it's natural, it was always meant to be, and once we found each other, there was never any doubt we would spend the rest of our lives together. Nothing will change that.

Change the World

The words of an Eric Clapton song come to mind:


If I could reach the stars I'd pull one down for you
Shine it on my heart so you could see the truth
That this love I have inside is everything it seems
But for now I find it's only in my dreams

CHORUS:
That I can change the world
I would be the sunlight in your universe
You will think my love was really something good
Baby if I could change the world

If I could be king even for a day
I'd take you as my queen I'd have it no other way
And our love will rule in this kingdom we have made
Till then I'd be a fool wishin' for the day

CHORUS:
That I can change the world
I would be the sunlight in your universe
You will think my love was really something good
Baby if I could change the world
Baby if I could change the world

- GUITAR SOLO -

CHORUS:
That I can change the world
I would be the sunlight in your universe
You will think my love was really something good
Baby if I could change the world
Baby if I could change the world
Baby if I could change the world