Day 10 - Keep Talking

How quickly ones high hopes can be dashed because of others who don't think about what they are doing, or not doing as the case may be.

First off I called the secretary to the Consultant dealing with cleo's case this morning, to chase up the family meeting that had been promised last week to be told there were no appointments available throughout December. I made the point that it had been promised, and that if that were the case then a promise should NOT have been made. Anyway, at that point i thought, OK, I will be better dealing with this when i am in the hospital this afternoon, so..

I got to the hospital just before 2pm today, only to find that cleo had been moved from the bay where she was, near the nurse's station to the "day room"; quite a relaxing large room at the side of the ward, with a lounge feel to it. In the room there were just two beds, cleo's and another lady well on the way to recovery.

cleo lit up as I arrived; she was sitting in her wheelchair, and was happy, waiting to go off to physiotherapy again, and as determined as yesterday. I was pleased that she was in such good spirits, and she looked, and sounded better than yesterday. Even her talking seemed improved. She was smiling, and joking. She told me she saw the consultant on his rounds this morning, but nothing specific was said.

A few minutes later the other lady in the room was taken off for physio, and the girl who collected her said cleo would be collected by James for her physio in a while. Everything was going according to plan.

Enter a nursing assistant who said "You are supposed to be on bedrest, I have to get you into bed" "pardon me?" I replied. "Bedrest, you are on bedrest" "Ok, I think you had better get the Sister in here, right now!"

Off she goes and a minute or two in comes the Ward Sister. By this time, cleo is in tears, because nobody has said anything to her, and I am starting to get really annoyed. She quite casually told us that she, and the consultant had decided after the round that because they were still not sure quite what caused the stroke, and there was a possibility of there still being a blood clot somewhere, that 24 hours in bed while they did some more tests was appropriate.

Hello, what about the patient? Don't they get to know too?

Of course, and I accept the reasoning fully, but for Christ's sake, Tell us! I went on to point out that here we have a 50 year old woman, who wants to be involved in her rehabilitation, she wants to know whats happening, and she wants to be included in the decisions that are made about her. Surely that's not too much to ask, is it ?

I do not scream and shout, but I do make my points forcefully, and clearly, which I did there and then. It also transpired that the physiotherapists had also not been told of this decision: they could have come in, taken cleo off to do an hours workout blissfully unaware of all this, when the consequences could have been disastrous. I have now insisted that we have our appointment with the consultant: funny that they suddenly found an appointment available, and there is also going to be a "family meet the team" session for me, cleo, and the girls on friday, where all those involved in her care will be present, to enable us to ask questions, and better understand what's happening.

Why this could only happen as a result of someone having to get angry I do not know. I will pursue this, because frankly it stinks. From now on I shall be grilling the medical team daily to ensure that all is right, and that cleo is fully informed of anything that has any consequence regarding her care. When I say grilling, I mean "Nobody expects the Spanish inquisition"(remember the Monty Python sketch?)

It's so laughable really, that if it were not so serious it would be the stuff of comedy. However it's not, and the consequences could have been dire to say the least!

So, with cleo now upset again, physio cancelled and back to bed pans, all the last few days' good work is undone by one moment of idiocy. This could all have been avoided if they had simply talked to her, and not about her. It won't happen again, believe me.

That said, cleo was allowed to have a bath this morning (she loves a bath!) and as I mentioned she looked great when I arrived, hair washed, and very chirpy. If only these people had considered what effect their lack of communication with the most important person could have had.

Anyway, back home to get the girls, and I have to tell them the news that they won't be able to take mum for a coffee like yesterday, and I explain what's happened, and why. They understand of course, but it's obvious they are unhappy, too. We buy coffee on the way to the ward and take the drinks with us, and at the end of visiting we leave cleo happy again, and about to watch "Grease" on her portable DVD player.

Home now, we feasted on chinese takeaway and the kids are staying with me this evening. It's so good to have them home where they should be, and that might just be next weeks campaign: Get the Kids Back Home. We will see, and maybe a call to the family solicitor will help.

Keep Talking

As Pink Floyd so succinctly put in their song Keep Talking:

"For millions of years mankind lived just like the animals
Then something happened which unleashed the power of our
imagination
We learned to talk

There's a silence surrounding me
I can't seem to think straight
I'll sit in the corner
No one can bother me
I think I should speak now
I can't seem to speak now
My words won't come out right
I feel like I'm drowning
I'm feeling weak now
But I can't show my weakness
I sometimes wonder
Where do we go from here

It doesn't have to be like this
All we need to do is make sure we keep talking

Why won't you talk to me
You never talk to me
What are you thinking
What are you feeling
Why won't you talk to me
You never talk to me
What are you thinking
Where do we go from here

It doesn't have to be like this
All we need to do is make sure we keep talking

Why won't you talk to me
You never talk to me
What are you thinking
What are you feeling
Why won't you talk to me
You never talk to me
What are you thinking
What are you feeling

I feel like I'm drowning
You know I can't breathe now
We're going nowhere
We're going nowhere"

The NHS may be a huge lumbering beast which goes on regardless, but it hasn't come up against me before.

Well, it has now!